These are from July 2008.
1. Describe what being fit means to you. Who are your fitness role models? What qualities do you admire in these people?
A: Hmmm….what fitness means to me. Well, how I always describe how I’d feel at my goal is how I felt right before I had my third daughter. I was able to carry a basket of laundry up 3 flights of stairs at a quick pace, and I didn’t get winded. My asthma was completely under control. I felt really strong. I can add to that now, though. I am doing a lot of “boy” push-ups, and I LOVE them. Fitness means feeling a lot like a badass to me these days lol. It also means self-confidence.
I really like Jillian Michaels (duh) and Heidi Fletcher. The things they have in common are: they’re both short, and they’re both around my age. Heidi Fletcher is about a month younger and Jillian Michaels is 3 ½ years older. It’s pretty hard for me to get a lot of inspiration from someone in their 20’s. It’d be nice if either of them had kids… lol
I like in Heidi Fletcher a dare to be different attitude. I have read her site, and she talks about taking chicken breast into the movie theater with her friends. I love that! I think it really says something about your character to keep doing what will lead you to your goals, and not just following the crowd.
I like in Jillian Michaels… sheesh, this is a huge thing for me. Her passion is the biggest thing, I guess. I feel like she “gets” me. I’ve been listening to the podcast about setting bounderies, and she talks about obesity and how it’s a mindset and disease. I never really thought about Obesity being a disease, but the way she described the food issues, it really is. She talks about people who don’t feel the same way about food…and that’s alien to me. She talks about managing it for the rest of your life, and I get that. She’s also a badass, and I have always thought tough girls were cool as hell. I loved Linda Hamilton in Terminator 2 and watch Pink kick some serious ass in her “You and Your Hand” video. Madonna is buff for 50’s…and that is really cool. Jillian’s site is working for me like nothing else has. Even at times when I want to slip into my eating disorder (quick fix), I can rationalize that there really is no need, because this IS working. I’ve never had this kind of confidence before, and I know I will continue on this course forever. She also talks about other aspects of life, and not just fitness and diet. I’ve done so many things that I never thought I would do. So yeah, she’s at the top of my list.
I admire most fitness models/competitors, but those two are the ones I actually follow
2. How do you feel your life would be different if you were more fit? What would you do that you can’t do now?
A: Nothing I can’t do now! Physical stuff, of course, but why NOT do it now?!?! I could do more push ups… maybe not be as sore as I am today lol. I could wear the nice clothes in my closet. That’s a huge one for me. I have some REALLY nice business casual clothes my mother in-law bought me, and I’m ALMOST in them. That’s going to be so rewarding. Maybe I’ll wear a bathing suit. I haven’t worn one in 12 years. Also, I want to wear my wedding rings…that would be amazing for me.
3. What role does fitness play in your everyday life? What are three daily choices you can make that will allow you to incorporate more activity into your day?
A: Fitness gives me the confidence to do so much! Fitness dictates what I eat, how much I sleep, how much water I drink, how much protein I eat, how quick I am to turn down pizza, how I feel about myself and the people around me…it’s like an addiction…if I miss a workout, it’s like a smoker who didn’t get their nicotine. To get more activity? My ultimate goal (depending on work schedule that may change soon), would be the 2 a day workouts. Doing extra cardio in the evening…that would send my fitness to the next level I think. Maybe just being more active after work..maybe not a full workout, just not sitting at the computer lol I already park far from the grocery store, and I ditch the cart and carry the groceries whenever possible. I take the stairs when I’m not so sore… I think just being more aware after work is what I need to do for now.
Anyway, send your answers!
- Mood:
sleepy
I'm just going to read straight out of my binder lol
Today's goal: Day 1, get started, make binder completely (done)
Today's workout: Shape Up Frontside, this was really tough on my asthma. I had to pause it a couple of times, but I got it done in 32 minutes, 305 cals burned on that one.
Biggest Loser Volume 1, Bob's Boot Camp, another tough one, had to drop the weights a couple of times, but got it done in 35 mintues (with warm-up and cooldown), 302 calories burned with that one.
I read the newsletter, and it was really good. It was about paying it foward as Jillian always says. That's what I got from it anyway. ( I was in last weeks...and I was so excited).
In my focus journal (I'm using that for daily positives), I put that I was very excited about day 1, I burned 600 cals during my workout when my usual goal is 500, and I figured out my BMR so I could actually DO THE MATH with that and my workouts.
100oz of water today (whew, me and the bathroom are good friends!)
What I learned about myself? I want to eat when I'm angry. I grew up in an abusive household, and I think I'm afraid to show my anger. I really need to find a better outlet.
What I learned from Jillian? I listened to the podcast "Female Body Image" from the archives... I learned that liking yourself and making yourself feel better at others' expense are two different things. It's OK to like yourself and/or think you look good. Also, and this was on my way home from work (I think it's a big one for me) imagine someone you admire or respect there with you, cheering you on, when you're scared. I live with a lot of fear, and I think that one is really going to help me.
My math:
Calories eaten: 1,664 (this is high for me)
Burned with exercise and BMR: 2,020
Total: - 356
It's a minus, but honeslty it could have been better.
- Mood:
accomplished
Today I start "Jillian Michaels school of Fitness". It's a group of people on her site following a curriculum. I'm really hoping I can lose my last 33lbs with this plan. I just thought since today was day 1, I would post the info here... and the assignments as well :-)
JMSF Daily Curriculum
Daily Newsletter
Listen to Jillian Michaels Podcast
Todays Work Out - Circuit Training
Fitness & Food Journal
Focus Journal
Weekly Curriculum
Monday - Show & Tell
*What have I learned from Jillian this week
*What have I learned about myself
*Weekly Progress Photo Journal & Measurements
Tuesday - Biggest Loser
*Season Episode of Biggest Loser
or
*Read a Chapter of Winning By Losing
Wednesday - Extra Credit "Gravy Train"
*1-2 hours of Cardio
*Research the Archive on a topic of interest
*Outline of Jillian Michaels Radio Program
Thursday - LCW Exam Cram
*Last Chance Workout - To increase my Test Score (Weigh In)
Friday - Test Day Weigh In
-2 pounds =A
-3 to 5 pounds = A+
-1 pounds = A-
-0 pounds = B (Review and Retest Next Week)
+1 pounds = C (Did you forget to study?)
+2 pounds = D (Did you cheat?)
+3 pounds = F (It's okay, but time to go back to basics)
Saturday - Freestyle Fun
*Doing something active and fun with my family
Biking
Walking Trail
Swimming
Sunday - Rest & Reflect
*Meditate: Discover what I have learned about myself & from Jillian
Jillian KFI Radio Broadcast
Visualize my goals and dreams
Set my next weekly goal
I changed my ticker to a more "schoolish" one too lol
- Mood:
determined
There's a lot of blogging going on about mothers. It makes sense, because today IS Mother's Day after all.
I hate Mother's Day.
I am a mother, and a damn good one. I hate it because my mother just wasn't. I'm ok with it, I'm 30 now, and I just feel bad for her. I know now that what someone is most upset about another person about is actually something they don't like about themselves. I think that's true with her. I think she always hated that she wasn't perfect. She tried and tried to make ME perfect, but I wasn't either, and I was a direct connection to her imperfectness.
I don't want anyone to freak out on me for not honoring my mother, etc. I'm polite to my mother. We're just not friends. It's ok, though, and I'm not sure if she even notices.
I hate Mother's Day, because I always pick apart my parenting skills. My biggest fear is turning into my mother. I know I'm not, but I still am very careful.
So, I hate Mother's Day. I'm glad it'll be over in 1/2 hour.
My eating today was great. It is my workout day off, but I did some light Yoga. Still having a hard time with getting into something like Yoga. I like beating myself up too much, I think. Tomorrow is Upper Body, and I'm going to do a pyramid workout.
- Mood: tired
I've been away from fitness for about a week. Maybe a week and a half. I let stress and life get the best of me.
I think I've gained a couple of pounds back. I'll weigh myself in the morning to be sure. Then, it's time to be back on track. Thanks everyone for sticking around.
(imagine that title said like the magician in "Frosty the Snowman" when he says "busy busy busy") One of my fav movies (and I don't celebrate Christmas lol)
Ok, So I'm about to make a vow to all of you. I'm going to start posting every other day MINIMUM. Hopefully everyday.
First, the personal stuff, then I'm going to (as promised to a wonderful friend at work) I'm going to post my most useful tips to losing weight.
I've been SO stressed! I applied for a supervisor position at work and I'm just waiting...waiting to get my interview time. I did it smart, and I put a suit in the locker of my desk lol. Last time I went for a supervisory position, they e-mailed me "Your interview is today at 11". This was at 9. *whew* talk about nerves... I bombed the interview...and I think that sudden freak out is why. I've been emotional eating for DAYs. Sometimes I have a day here and there, but lemme tell ya, I'm back up to 141. So, I went to sparkpeople and jillianmichaels.com and hit "start program over". Because, like kindergarten, do overs are OK! I didn't gain ALL of my weight back, so not all is lost. Also, I developed some great habits. Now, time to learn consistency!
Also, my work changed what we do. We went from being a pharmacy (which I LOVED) to being a Diabetes Supply Center (which I fear will fail). Quite stressful. I want the supervisory position so bad... 1, I need the money for my kids. 2, would love to get health insurance. 3, if it did fail, I'd have something nice to put on my resume :-)
So, yeah, a lot of my eating came from stress.
Anyway, do overs are OK!
Here is today's diet and next post MY FAVORITE TIPS!
DATE MEAL FOOD Calories
5/1/2008 breakfast 100% Oats 150
5/1/2008 breakfast White Stevia Powder, 2 serving 2
5/1/2008 breakfast Milled Flax Seeds, 1 tbsp 30
5/1/2008 lunch Kroger Lite Wheat, 3 serving 120
5/1/2008 lunch Chicken Cutlet, Kroger, 1 serving 150
5/1/2008 lunch Yoplait Original - Strawberry, 1 serving 170
5/1/2008 dinner Microwavable Sweet Potato, 1 serving 130
5/1/2008 dinner Kraft, FF, Mozzarella, 0.25 cup 45
5/1/2008 dinner Kroger Large Egg, 3 serving 210
5/1/2008 snack Quaker, Chocolate Chunk, chewy bar, 1 serving 90
5/1/2008 snack Vanilla Ice Cream (icecream), 0.5 cup (4 fl oz) 133
5/1/2008 snack Butterscotch or caramel topping, 2 tbsp 103
5/1/2008 snack Chocolate Sprinkles, 2 tbsp 90
5/1/2008 snack Kraft miracle whip regular, 4 tbsp 140
5/1/2008 supplement Amino Burst 3000, 3 serving 10
5/1/2008 supplement B-Complex 50, 2 serving 0
5/1/2008 supplement Calcium Plus, 3 serving 0
5/1/2008 supplement CLA, 3 serving 30
5/1/2008 supplement D-3 1,000, 1 serving 0
5/1/2008 supplement Ester-C 1000, 1 serving 0
5/1/2008 supplement Fish Oil Capsules, 3 serving 30
5/1/2008 supplement Glucosamine 750, Chondrointin 600, 1 serving 0
5/1/2008 supplement Magnesium 500, 1 serving 0
5/1/2008 supplement Sea Kelp, 1 serving 0
5/1/2008 supplement Vitamin C 1,000, 2 serving 0
5/1/2008 supplement Women's Ultra Mega, 2 serving 0
Daily total 1,633
Over or Under? over 233
- Mood:
excited - Music:Does elmo count?
Eek...kinda lonely and bored. First thought is ice cream... not gonna do it though!
So much is going through my head today. I'm thinking partly about a woman at work that is "warning" my friends about me. She says I'm pushy..especially when it comes to the diet stuff. She's right, and I know it. I just wish she had come to me instead of running around talking about it. It's something I've been working on. It's like I can't help but give someone all the support in the world when they ask for it. That sounds good, but I don't know how to back off when they change their mind :-)
I ate a couple hundred calories over my limit today. I know it's because I was at home, and I didn't drink my water for the day. They're changing my hours at work... maybe I'll get the schedule that I work 6 days per week... maybe that would be a good kick in the butt :-) I seem to want to eat too much when my schedule is inturrupted. Not that 200cals is going to make or break my whole week or anything, but I still tend to get frustrated with myself.
Anyway, I'll write more tomorrow, I gotta get some sleep so I can get up and workout in the morning!
I think some people don't get along with me because I am simply "too much." I'm very in your face, you know? I get excited, and I'm like some hyper-active kid. My hands start waving around and I might say I'm "Jillianized" because she's very much like that. I get compared to her by a friend of mine when I start that. There are quite shy types who get overwhelmed by me :-)
- Mood: optimistic
Hey! I have created a community for people who follow Jillian's plans (from the biggest loser) or just fans of hers. I'm a huge fan, and I follow Winning by Losing. Please check it out!
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about motivation and timing. I have people I know asking me how to do what I’m doing. Yes, my body has changed a little, but I think they notice more my self-confidence and attitude. Some say they want to know how to do it. Some say they wish they had my motivation.
I get that, because I used to think the same thing about other people. Really, anyone. I’d see people who joined a gym and think if I only had their money I could lose my weight…I could get in shape. I’d see people who joined Jillian’s site online, well, Jillian has been my idol for awhile. I’d think if only I had that opportunity, I could do it too. I’d see people on the Biggest Loser and think they were so lucky. I even had the idea that they were lucky to be big enough to get on that show and learn it all HA
I was such a fool. No one has a benefit over anyone else. I promise! I had to figure out that I wanted what I am getting now more then where I was and comfort. It’s comfortable to stay where you are. If you are not ready to be that uncomfortable, you’re not ready. It’s scary, it’s hard, it’s time-consuming (at first), and sometimes you’re going to have to fake motivation.
As an example (and it’s not anyone that knows about this page), there is a nice lady at my work. She’s as nice as nice can be. She said she wanted to lose weight and brought up the conversation with me. First, maybe she didn’t learn the lesson most of my friends have. If you do that, if you come to me with that, you’re going to be handed Jillian radio shows…you’re going to have me making you a food journal…and I’m going to be saying things like “You can totally do this!”. You also get an unlimited “Jillian says…” quotes for the rest of the time you are in my presence lol. She asked what I do, and I’m more than happy to share. If I can get the whole world to feel like I do now, why not?!?! I get up at 5am to workout before work. “Oh I can’t do that, get up that early.” Ok, fine, being from the land of no excuses anymore, I say “Yeah, a lot of people workout in the evening. It doesn’t really matter when…it’s whenever you have the time!” You see, I have disabled children. I really can only focus on a workout when they are in bed. So, 5am is MY time. “Oh, I’m too tired when I leave here. I couldn’t do that…” I should learn a lesson from her… when I hear these things, I should realize that person is not ready for change. I don’t get that, though. I’m still in the mode of being excited and totally believing they can do it. The problem is, I believe it more then they do.
Another lady at my work (someone else who doesn’t know about this site…because, frankly, we’re not friends), has decided to drink smoothies instead of eating. UGH, where do I start?!?! She’s not fat, but she does this. She’s on weight watchers too…and the two together don’t add up. If you do the points in those smoothies…but anyway lol. She’s reaching some people after they have talked to me. I want to slap her head and ass together, quite frankly. Of course her plan sounds great to those not ready. You hear my plan of learning more and more about health and yourself and working harder then you ever have in your life, and then you hear “Nah, you can just drink this sweet drink”. Sure, in the moment, that would be nice, wouldn’t it?!?! No food journal…optional exercise…because of course, she doesn’t really go into that, no thinking… Great! Sign me up! But, she’s sadly mistaken. At best, they won’t lose weight or lose some and put it back on. At worst, they will put on weight and become frustrated and just give up on themselves altogether. Maybe some health problems..diabetes, heart disease, maybe more. But, I doubt they can follow it long enough for the health risks. I already see them hitting vending machines after the sugar crash hits.
Anyway, I’m getting long-winded. Basically, it’s not about being motivated. It’s about being ready. Not ready to go on a diet…ready to change it FOREVER. It has to be important enough to make the time (not like the great lady from my work who can’t get up earlier and can’t do it later) and it’s important enough to learn as much as you can…not try to make it simple… (like the “smoothie people). Well, actually, I think, are YOU important enough to make the time for and learn for? I know I am…and that’s what the people who wish they had my motivation should wish they had. They should wish they thought they are important enough.
- Mood: happy
Also, maybe it can help some of the people I don't know who read this.
A big tip I learned from one of Jillian's radio show yesterday has been a hit around this house for 2 days now :-)
Take a brown paper lunch bag and regular popcorn kernals (not the microwavable kind either, those are terrible for you!) put 1/4 cup of the kernals in the bag...fold the end, microwave for 2 minutes. Air popped popcorn w/out the popper! It's also cheap! 150 cals and a great snack. My daughters, husband, and me all have been eating on it!
I think this blog is about to become a great reminder reference for me later too :-)
- Mood: energetic
Ok, so I owe everyone an apology.
I got caught up with both jobs and simply neglected to update my blog.
BUT, I am down to 138! OUT OF THE 140'S FOREVER!
My calories and workouts have been great. Just letting you all know I AM BACK. I took my second job down to 1 day per week and I am going to see if I can make it that way. I need to take care of me.
- Mood: accomplished
On the Jillian radio show I was listening to on my way here (at work), she talked about how having obese friends upped your chances of having obesity. She read a study that showed that having an obese best friend increased your chances more than your spouse being obese. I think I agree with that. Your spouse isn’t going to tell you you’re getting fat if they are fat…but your best friend (if they’re a true best friend) will pull not punches if they are skinny, you know? NO WAY would Joe tell me I’m getting fat…unless I was like 400 pounds, but I think Stacey (my best friend) would tell me when I came close to 200!
I wanted to say that I really like the people I’ve met on here already. I’m very inspired and love reading what you all post.
Today I did Jillian’s SHRED DVD level 1
26 minutes… 245 cals burned
Kathy Smith “Lifting Weights to Lose Weight” Upper body
22 minutes… calories burned 208
Stretch from the Power Sculpt DVD
6 minutes… calories burned 41
That all took it out of me! I must have really pushed myself!
Tomorrow’s workout is my last chance cardio workout. Gotta kill it before the weigh-in on Wednesday!
Today's diet:
Calories: 1,390
Fat: 26g 16.5 %
Carbs: 184g 50.9%
Protein: 118g 32.7 %
Fiber: 27g
Today was a success!
- Mood: accomplished
3 days cardio 3 strength and posting food and everything. That's my workout planned schedule too...and you must take it up a notch. Can do :-) The cardio has to be 30 minutes, so I'll use the Biggest Loser Cardio Max DVD :-)
I'll post here how I did too!
- Mood: excited
I had a really rough night tonight.
On Jillian's site, she has a contest going where you send in a video telling how you've changed your life, how she inspired you, etc. Well, she's been my idol for quite some time, and I have changed A LOT. Not just fitness and weight, but self-confidence, etc. Well, we were going to buy a video camera for the family anyway...so I bought one a litter earlier than planned. Turned out, couldn't upload video to the computer from it. I found this out after several tries to get a video that I liked. So, it's due today. My hubby told me while I was at the store, to go ahead and get a webcam to use. So, I did. Came home, got ready to do the video...had no sound. I had no idea I needed a microphone. Well, he is at a friends watching wrestlemania... I called him very upset, and he said that I was being "pathetic" to buy a camera just for that (after he told me to) and that he was trying to watch the show. He kept asking what I wanted HIM to do about it. Nothing...I just needed to get it out of my system. I had tried for DAYS to make this video and nothing was working the way it was planned. The winner gets an at-home visit from Jillian... and now I can't enter. I was just very frustrated.
While I was yelling with him, I said "I know it's PATHETIC, but what else do I have?!?!" I think that's the root of it all.. really. I have 3 daughters, and two of them are disabled. I work 2 jobs. I really don't have any hobbies outside of working out and eating right. What else do I do besides work?!?! I can't do the normal mom outings with my kids...they won't tolerate it. My hubby works with a local wrestling federation and is always doing something wrestling related. What do I do besides work? Ever since the argument I've been thinking that maybe I need a life...but I don't know where to get one. Everytime I have PMS I get this way, thinking how I need a life and just really want to have fun.
Anyway, the day in diet/exercise was actually almost perfect. I meant to do an abs workout, but I didn't get to it. I'll do it tomorrow.
Cals: 1,209
Fat 36g (23.6% of cals)
Carbs 185g (53.9% of cals)
Protein: 78g (22.5 % of cals)
Fiber: 35g
Workout was:
Beachbody power half hour, buns 30 mins, 254 cals burned
and
Kathy Smith "The Rules of Fat Burning" 20 mins, 188 cals burned.
The only things to work on tomorrow? Higher protein and more water! Been struggling with the water...not sure why.
- Mood:
disappointed
I've decided to chronicle my journey here.
Right now I weigh 142.8. I started at 147.2. My goal is 110.
I suppose I'll start with the reasons I want this so badly.
I always knew it was good to make a list of reasons to be fit/healthy. I finally made my own, and I'm going to share them here.
1. I want to feel like I did before I had Dani.
Dani is my third daughter, and even my hubby talks about what good shape I was in then.
2. I want to wear my wedding rings again.
Before I had Dani, I had them sized smaller.... now they don't fit.
3. I want to feel comfortable in nice clothes again.
I have suits and such that I won't wear even though they do fit. They're too snug in my eyes.
4. I want to feel more "grown up".
I can't explain it, but being heavier makes me feel immature. I feel like I'm not taken seriously. I realize it's my perception and it's really my crap I'm projecting onto them, but it's true.
5. I want to feel in control of my life.
I feel much more hectic too
6. I want to be viewed as a professional.
Somehow I see professional looking as fit and fast. Not sure where that comes from.
7. I want to feel like it's worth it to try to look nice
Obviously self-esteem issues
8. I want to show my mom it can be done.
My mom has always said that when you get older, you just get fat. Also, she told me when I found out I was pregnant with my first daughter "You'll never lose this weight." A LOT of past issues with my mother. I am only casual with her now.
9. I want to stop my family legacy of illness.
My grandfather died of heart disease in his 20's. My father has heart disease. 3 of my aunts have diabetes. 2 of them had the veins in their legs operated on and thought they would lose their legs due to obesity and blood flow. They blame genetics... it's so painfully obviously diet.
10. I want to prove to myself I can get there.
I've never been at my goal. I'm 30. My goal is 110 and that is right in the healthy range for my height. I just want to know I can get there.
11. I want to have better self-confidence. Any would be nice.
12. I want to teach my daughters a better way to live
13. I want to live as long as I can, with the best quality of life possible
14. I want to live with passion.
I'll be posting daily things here
- Mood: determined
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